I have three children, ages 4, 2, and 5 months. Each Sunday we do our very best to have a relatively calm, reverent experience during Sacrament meeting, but each Sunday we leave church wondering why we bother to come. I understand that at their age they can't be expected to sit perfectly still and listen the whole time, but I really worry when our family becomes a distraction to others.
Part of the problem is that we have to get there about 20 minutes early because I'm the organist and have to do prelude. So, they have to sit there a full 90 minutes, which is long for anyone! One particular problem is that my two-year-old refuses to whisper and gets quite loud, especially when you ask her to be quiet...this provokes even louder talking. We've tried a variety of things, but nothing seems to be too effective. What can we do to help our kids make it through the whole meeting without going bonkers?! Has hanyone had any success in this area?
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Sacrament Meeting Woes
Posted by emily at 1:08 PM
Labels: Religious instruction, Tricks of the Trade
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6 comments:
I'm excited to hear what has worked for others on this as well. We've had a few things that have worked for us:
1. 2-year-old loudness: When Jackson talks loudly, I repeat what he says in a whisper instead of telling him to be quiet-usually he will echo me in a whisper immediately and we can keep that going.
2. Time out closet: I'm sure you know what I'm talking about-every church has some closet or room with no windows. We make this the time out closet where we go with the light off and the child has to sit on our lap until he gets in control. My parents used to take us to the car, but my kids liked going outside so we had to find something they didn't like.
3. Church schedule: I'll post this sometime-I made a schedule for Brig when he was 2 that really helped him not ask how much longer and kept him interested. I took pictures of the hymn book, and cut out pictures from Ensigns/Friends of the sacrament, someone talking, someone praying, etc., laminated them, and put a piece of velcro on them. I put the other pieces of velcro on a binder (see binder for #5) and then they make a schedule out of the pictures. As the meeting proceeds, they take off the pictures and put them in a bag. This keeps them attentive because they like to take the pictures off, but also stretches out their patience when they can see how much more until the last prayer.
4. Run laps outside before church starts.
5. Jesus book: I got all the pictures out of our gospel art kit that had animals or something else they boys are interested in, and I put them in page protectors in a small binder. I save this for during the sacrament when I REALLY want them to be quiet.
If you are married and can do this, I'd have your husband come seperately with the kiddos.
My husband used to have to be at church 10-20 mins early, after the first week of us all going together I quickly made the decision I'd drive myself, or drop him off and go back home (yep, even for just 10 minutes) the extra time was killer.
As for being reverent during the service---my 2 year old is a mystery to me. I have an older son, but he was a much calmer soul at 2 so it wasn't a big deal with him, but that isn't the case with his younger brother!
Good luck
We have 4 children, 6,4,2,and 5 months and we have similar feelings all the time. In our ward we have to be to church 15 minutes early so we can get a bench seat, but we take that opportunity to take a walk around the church. We look at all the pictures and talk about the stories behind them. We also get drinks at all the drinking fountains and, if needed, take a trip to the bathroom. That easily takes up the 10-15 minutes before church starts. We try to get into our seats a couple of minutes before hand and talk about the behavior that is expected during the meeting. We have had FHE on behavior during church as well and practice our quiet voices, how to sit during prayers, etc. My children need constant reminders about the expected behavior.
I have a bag that I take to church and I rotate each week what I put in, that way nothing is boring. Also then I can find out what keeps their attention and probably put that in for the next week. We have specific things in our "Sunday Box" that can only be played with on Sunday, so that helps. Lately what my children have liked is having pencils (which was a rare treat) with stencils. They will spend a good amount of time drawing dinosaurs, bears, shapes, etc.
We have tried to limit what we bring to church--No toys, all books are church related including coloring books, no food(unless we happen to have the schedule that is during lunch time or right after naps). This has helped our children distinguish better between church behavior and normal behavior.
Our son who is 6 just barely started sitting during church about 4 months ago. Every Sunday is a battle, but we just have to keep reminding ourselves that even though we aren't getting anything out of the meeting right now, we are establishing a pattern and setting an example for our children.
I know this is long--sorry, but it is something that I am constantly working on and coming up with new ideas. I add something to our Sunday box about once a month. This month I will probably add Megan's schedule so that will cut down on the constant asking, so thanks Megan!
Thanks everyone! These are all really great ideas, and I'm glad to see that I'm not the only one who struggles.
One question I have is this: My girls both like to sit on my lap, or lay down on the bench. This has caused problems with fighting over my lap and getting into each other's personal space ("quit TOUCHING me!") So we tried making it a rule that you must sit up and you can't sit on mom's lap, but enforcing these rules has caused just as much heart ache as not having them. Any suggestions here?
My husband usually has 2-3 children on his lap at a time, if there is a problem then everyone has to get off. Another thing that works is to take turns, "after the prayer then it is your turn until after the bread is passed." My children don't do well with time yet, so we have to do it by segments of things.
You shouldn't be such a nice mom-then they won't want to be on you! :)
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